George Fox Speaking

Martin Kelley — Tue, 02 Apr 2019 18:14:47 +0000

At some point 18 months ago, we at Friends Journal decided that a future issue would revolve around humor. I remember feeling a lump in my stomach at the time. I’ve learned to stop and poll my motivations before making a Quaker-related joke—not to see if it’s funny, but to make sure that at least most Quakers might think it’s funny. Well, that humor issue is out and available online. Many of the features talk about humor but the first feature actually aims for humor itself. Don McCormick imagines Quaker historical figures brought into modern-day cable news programming as they describe some of our rather odd customs.

George gives the camera a steely‐TV‐anchorman‐type look and says, “Hello, this is the evening edition of Fox News. George Fox speaking. For our first story, let’s turn to Will ‘the Quill’ Penn at the sports desk.”

“Good evening,” says Will. “Well, it’s half‐time over at Sierra Friends Center’s outdoor basketball court, and the Woolman Wombats are battling it out with the Quaker Oafs. Both teams just completed the league’s required workshops on nonviolent communication and the Alternatives to Violence Project. The score at half‐time is zero to zero. We have some footage from the second quarter.”

Fox News: George Fox Speaking

Our favorite news anchor goes on location with Will “The Quill” Penn and an assortment of dubiously fact-checked…

Friends Journal

Fox News - Quaker Ranter

George Fox Speaking