Gregg Koskela, the lead pas­tor of New­berg (Ore.) Friends Church until last year, has a heart-felt piece about learn­ing how to lis­ten to abuse stories:

For us who’ve walked this road (our­selves or with oth­ers), it all fits with the world we now live in, the one where our eyes have been opened and our hearts are filled at times with despair. This is the world where abuse hap­pens, where per­pe­tra­tors so often get away with it, where it’s so hard to risk reveal­ing it, where we see with crys­tal clar­i­ty that if you do dis­close, the ques­tions and doubts and the char­ac­ter assas­si­na­tion will overwhelm. 

https://​greg​gkoskela​.org/​2​0​1​8​/​0​9​/​2​7​/​s​e​l​f​-​r​e​i​n​f​o​r​c​i​n​g​-​c​y​c​l​es/